Question

Last night he said to me, "Hey mom, if one synchronized
swimmer drowns, do the others have to drown too?"

And I might have laughed for five minutes.
This boy is hilarious.

The moon this morning

Denali girl

Sweet waffles, I adore this little lady. I just can't get over how good she is and how much
we love having her around. Today I gave her a bath, which she clearly did not love. But instead
of acting out or being crazy, she just stood stock-still and looked a bit embarrassed to be participating,
but let me get her good and clean. She is honestly the sweetest ever. And I am such a fan of her.

My time in St. George

This last weekend was pretty wonderful. It was so kind of Jacob to let me get away and
it was even more wonderful that I was able to see several of my favorite people. I wasn't able
to see an aunt and uncle of mine, plus several cousins I would have loved to visit with, so I'll
have to go again soon, but I was grateful to see this collection of darling people I adore.

This is my brother. He is hilarious and sweet and has an amazing heart and makes me
so happy to be around. And did I mention he is one of the funniest people I know?

This is my aunt, my dad's only sibling. She is one of the kindest people I have ever known,

is so loving and good to me and gave me a gift that I will treasure for the rest of my life.

This is my aunt and uncle, one of my mom's younger brothers. I absolutely adore them
and their goodness to me and could talk to them for hours and it still wouldn't be enough.
 

This is my sister-in-law and her husband. She is one of the most thoughtful people I know
and never forgets to acknowledge anything significant in the lives of our little family.

And this lovely lady is why I went to St. George in the first place. And I was so busy talking
and laughing and crying with her, I forgot to take a picture (so had to borrow one from her FB page).
She is one of my favorite people on the earth and every second with her feels like a huge blessing.
Her friendship truly feels like a incredible gift from my Heavenly Father and I'm so grateful.

A fast forty-eight hours

Home again, home again, jiggety-jig.

My sweet Gram

I just miss her so much.

A weekend away

The first part of my drive to St. George today was spent listening to a couple of health podcasts
on the thyroid and trying to navigate the intense winter weather safely and in one piece. The second
half included beautiful skies and much singing and dancing. Except for the one song where I allowed
my broken heart to just sob at the idea that a drive to St. George doesn't include seeing my Gram.

But did I mention there was singing and dancing? Very loud singing and very fancy dancing to be
exact. (Fun fact, Jacob's car stereo goes up to a maximum of 40. Good to know.) And if I read the
thoughts of the passing drivers correctly, which I know I did as that is one of my super powers, they
were jealous of my rad dance moves and of my slightly below mediocre yell-singing voice.

Well, except for the one guy who wondered why the old lady in the maroon car was screaming and
dancing like a lunatic when there were plenty of thyroid podcasts to be played. But I ignored him.

So much love for this boy of mine

No words for the sweetness of my Nathan boy. When I found this on the nightstand by my
bed after he went off to school this morning, I got a little teary. I'm so grateful to be a mom.

Half-mast

There is an enormous flag at the end of a road I take multiple times a week
to Grace's preschool. And I absolutely love that I get to see it often, as it
reminds me how much I love my country and how blessed I feel to live here.

But on days like today, when it flies at half-mast, it breaks my heart.
A lot. That has been the case too often lately. And because of those
reasons and others that weigh heavily on my heart, I worry.

And when I do, I have to pause and remind myself Who I worship and
why I worship Him. Because while He will never take our agency away,
I don't believe we truly realize how close He is and how constantly He is
wiping our tears, matching them with His own and extending peace
and love and comfort and hope, where there seems little.

I know God loves His children and that the power of the Savior's Atonement can
cover everything we experience in this life. Not because I want it to be true or
someone told me it was, but because I have experienced it personally and profoundly.
And that knowledge is enough. Even with so many unknowns in this life, it truly is enough.

Snow

Unexpected winter

Good grief Utah, way to pull an unexpected day of winter--during winter.
But there is a certain Husky that seems to be a fan of you. So there's that.

Our Nali girl

After weeks and weeks of searching (through hundreds of available dogs and texting
many a person to ask additional questions), I think I sufficiently surprised Jacob
with his birthday present. And not just because his birthday isn't for two more weeks.

Meet Denali (named after the highest mountain in Alaska), Jacob's new running
partner. She is trained exceptionally well, is capable of running for miles and miles,
yet is insanely calm and sweet both in the house and with every person and animal
she meets. We have all fallen hard. Especially yours truly--once I realized I'm not
a puppy person, but a slightly older dog that is already trained is just really fabulous.

Happy Birthday Jacob Ethan! I'm feeling quite confident I got the dog thing right this time.
Because Nali is the sweetest and the best. Which is why I knew you two belonged together.

Tower of Power

This little stud just came up to me and somewhat shyly asked if he could show me something.
When I told him sure, he flexed his muscles and let me know that he had been downstairs "using
the orange weights" I asked him if I could feel his amazing muscles and made sure he knew I was
impressed. Then this boy asked me if it was okay if he wrote on his shirt. I told him it was one of his
nicer shirts and asked what it was he wanted to write on it. To which he replied, "Tower of Power."

Honestly. My children and their lack of self-esteem.

Such incredible thoughtfulness

Do you want to hear the cutest Valentine's story ever? I thought so. While texting
Annie yesterday morning, she told me that a boy at school had found out how many
girls went to their school and collected money and bought a rose for every girl in the
high school. And passed them out this morning. Annie texted me a picture of her rose.
And I about died from the sweetness that is that boy and so many senior boys
(including my own) that contributed to make it happen. It made my whole day.

And just to make this story even more amazing, there are 1400 girls that go to this high school.
I just can't get over it.

Love and favorites

He's my favorite on Valentine's. And every other day of the year.

Oh I love Jacob Allen.

I'm a really great mom

I have several things I'm not a fan of in food and one of them is dyes.
I'm not claiming we never consume them for sure, but I do work hard to limit
them. And as you can clearly tell, I'm extra vigilant around Valentine's.

This gorgeous girl

My assistant during pictures Saturday night.
She's the best. And the cutest. And I adore her.

Pictures forever...and ever

One of our darling neighbors asked if I would take the photos for her dance group last night and
I quickly said yes, because if you haven't ever realized it before, I loveth pictures. And obviously,
as evidenced by this photo Annie took, I will do most anything to get them just the way I want them.

Sweethearts Dance

My handsome boy and the darling girl that asked him to Sweethearts.
Just so much cuteness in one photo.

Our new clocks

I walked by these new clocks that hang on our wall last night and had to take
a picture, because I like them so much. And wish I'd had the idea to do them
years earlier when our parents started serving missions all around the world.

That top clock is our local time and the clock below shows what time
it is in Accra, Ghana. A sweet reminder of where Jacob's parents are
and what they might be doing and how grateful we are for them.

And before anyone asks me where my large wooden letter A (painted teal)
is at or my multiple black and white photos surrounding these clocks were
put or how I forgot to hang a cute little shelf with a few books stacked up
next to a colorful bird or llama or both on it, I'll just remind you I'm not
that decorator. I admire those decorators and think, "How lovely of them."

But my style could best be described as Early Organized Minimalism To
the Point That Some People Might Feel Sad in Their Hearts For Us Because
They Assume We're Poor. It's a new trend, expect to see it on HGTV in no time.

But worry not, in very few months, there will be one more clock added to that wall.
And my mother's heart couldn't be anymore excited, heartbroken or proud.

The morning of my birthday

When I thought about the one thing I wanted to have happen yesterday, I realized that
Tuesday was the day my darling dad serves in the temple as a sealer. And so, I spent
the morning in the temple, with my amazing dad, doing my best to serve those
who have passed on and desire, just like me, to be with their families forever.

It was one of the sweetest experiences I have ever had and I will be forever
grateful for a memory like that in my life. Because when I walked out of the
temple two mornings ago, my heart felt a whole lot like that last picture.

Some thoughts on yesterday

Several days ago, Jacob asked me about my favorite memories of being 40. I thought
about it for a few seconds and to be honest, it was just a really hard year. Of course there
were incredible miracles that I will never forget and always be thankful for, but for some
reasons I have shared and very many I have not, the year, in all honesty, kind of stunk.
And when I said that aloud to Jacob, we both cracked up, because it was so true.

So I think that is why yesterday meant so much to me. I've had many birthdays that were

very calm and with little notice paid and those have been just fine and even wonderful also.
But after the difficult year I went through, it just meant more to me than any of you could
know to receive so much kindness. And it almost felt like my Heavenly Father was so sweetly
reassuring me that He is more than aware of the hard and that I am loved. He is so good to me.

Today

I'm laying here in bed with my birthday almost over, but I cannot go to sleep until I thank you all for the overwhelming kindness extended to me in the last 24 hours. I do not have words for what this day brought and the incredible goodness of so many of you.

I wish I could share everything here, it will always be written on my heart, but between the posts Jacob shared on Instagram and his calling and texting and wishing me happy birthday dozens of times, my kids working together behind my back (with their dad who had to be out of town this week) to surprise me this morning with treats and candles and breakfast and flowers and cards, a morning spent in the temple with my dad, my brother showing up at my door with cookies and to visit and laugh, a dear friend dropping off a quilt that she spent months and months making and that made me sob when I unwrapped it, my wonderful parents taking me out to dinner tonight so we could talk and laugh, my sweet in-laws sending me a message first thing this morning from clear across world, my other brothers and two sisters texting me the sweetest messages throughout the day, Jacob's two grandmas calling with such thoughtful messages, receiving flowers from my darling sister-in-law and a touching text from another sister-in-law, a gift from my visiting teacher and my sweet friend I get to visit teach, friends that tended my littles while I was in the temple and literally so many texts and emails and phone calls and IG messages, I had to spend more than an hour just to respond to each one--and still have a few left that came in tonight, it was unreal.

And then, as if this day was not amazing enough, my older brother called me tonight. And when I picked up the phone, he started singing to me. And to many people that wouldn't be a big deal on a birthday, but he and I were incredibly close to our sweet Gram and the hardest part of my birthday since she left this earth is not to have her call and sing. And for some reason, I not only heard his voice, but I heard hers also. And I couldn't quit crying. Not out of sadness, but out of gratitude. That I could have a day like I did today and that it would end like it did tonight.

Thank you so very much dear friends. I'm so overwhelmed.

Friends

I think it's so sweet how well all of our animals get along.

Buddies

A little sickie and her cat keeping her company. It wasn't until I uploaded this picture that
I noticed Grace was holding onto Finn's tail. Poor cat. He puts up with one crazy household.

The moon

I didn't get to see the lunar eclipse a couple of mornings ago,
but this picture I took of the moon the evening before is kind of awesome.

My hike this morning

Do you remember those books on tape we used to listen to that beeped when it was time to turn
the page? Well, how fun would it be for me to make a version of that for you to join me on my
hike this morning? What's that? Well, I think we all know how this is going to turn out anyway.

  1. I'm so artistic in my nature picture taking.
 
Beep

2. See, I told you.
 
Beep

3. If you look closely at this photo, you can see a gorgeous mountain, very far
away, covered in snow. A mountain I am not on. Oh happy day. This has
been the best winter ever. Sorry all you snow lovers. Better luck never.

Beep

4. Pine trees in the mountains, what?

Beep

5. And a stream? Linn Allen's family blog is riveting.

Beep

6. Two roads diverged in a Utah wood and I--took the one less icy.
Oh good grief, someone assign me a church talk stat, I'm obviously ready.
Well, minus the part where I did the opposite of what we should often do in life.

Beep

7. The best part of the hike was so much alone time in nature.
Emphasis on alone. This is where you begin humming On My Own.

Beep

8. Oh hooray, the descent is always better than the ascent. Another church talk
right there. Only...it's beginning to dawn on me that I'm a terrible Mormon.

The end.