Twelve years of our sweet Grace

This darling birthday girl

 
Happy Birthday to our darling baby girl who is somehow TWELVE today!
Oh our Grace Susanna is something else. So good and kind, so mature and yet innocent,
so full of talent and loveliness, so close to her Savior and her Father in Heaven.
 And her laugh, well that is for sure is one of the best sounds ever.

She’s everything God knew we needed to complete our family and the relationship she has,
with each of her six siblings, is so sweet to watch. They are so incredibly good to her and she loves
 them uniquely and deeply. And she and her darling dad, not sure there could be anything cuter than
 their closeness. She’s sincerely one of my closest friends and the times we talk and laugh together
are some of my favorite memories—I’m just so honored to be her mom AND her friend.

So proud of this beautiful, birthday girl and so grateful that twelve years ago this very day, God sent
her to us. We are happier, funnier, kinder, closer to Jesus and as a family because of this little love.

Happiest Birthday Gracie girl, love you so much sis!

A California soccer tournament

Nate was in Huntington Beach this weekend for a soccer tournament. And his amazing dad is the
one that made it possible for him to go, joining him the whole time to make it fun and exciting.

The team didn't advance to the championship, but it was a fabulous trip with some
incredible soccer, multiple trips to the beach, eating out together, a top golf afternoon and
mostly, the best time with his teammates just laughing and having a blast.

So thankful for times when we can make fun things happen for this Nathan boy,
who is just so incredibly grateful and good. I'm such a fan of him. 

And that's a wrap

Her summer on the river has come to an end and we're so happy to have her back at college,

a few hours closer to us. Oh this Annie Allen, she's something else.

A work trip to the Philippines

He's home from another two-week work trip. This time to the Philippines. So many good things
  happening for the measurement and evaluation of this global initiative. It's a lot to accomplish,
but Jacob and his team are doing it so very well. I'm grateful for my husband's good heart and
  willingness to work extremely hard to help improve the lives of the most vulnerable around us.
What an honor to serve God's kids. We really are so grateful for the privilege.

August service project

The August service project was sweet and simple and just what it needed to be.

This is the last time donating food items to the Episcopal Church of the Good Shepherd
 this year (but also taking into account the money I’ve set aside from Jacob and my
contributions to give them a large check in October to help with the cold weather
lunches that always need a little more substance) and I loved it.

These people and their incredible goodness in providing the homeless community in their
 area a sack lunch each Wednesday(plus, I recently learned they also serve some low-income
 nursing homes that need extra help with lunches each week), is just so beautiful and amazing.
 I have loved that we have been able to help donate food several times and also volunteer a few
 times in addition. This church and these people will always have a special place in my heart
and I’m excited to continue to help them in the coming months and years.

In addition, I thought it was the sweetest that the woman in charge of this program
volunteered to pick up the donations from our house this month, because of a
scheduling issue that came up for me. She’s become such a good friend and
that has been the sweetest bonus blessing to this particular service project.

Thank you for those that donated, I can’t tell you how much it is appreciated or
how many times the people running this program have asked me to thank you.

It’s a lot.

Because you sure give a lot.

The best game

The coolest of goals for our Nate today and this fantastic photo of his team
rushing him and the pure joy on his face. 

And then two other amazing pictures that showcase this amazing boy, his hard work
and his incredible degree of athleticism.

Oh I love him.

Another first day of school

12th, 8th and 6th. Three different schools, three amazing kids.

It’s going to be a good year, I can feel it.

My thoughts tonight

Just sitting in the backyard, taking a moment to breathe after a very full first day
of school for our three youngest. With so many thoughts running through my head.

This summer was wonkadoo. Just bananas to me, for so many reasons,
and I am exhausted to a point that I haven’t felt in a while.

AND

I’m sincerely just the luckiest girl ever to be a wife and mother and to get to do that
with all my days and hours. For me personally, I can’t even fathom doing anything else.

AND

I need order and a schedule so badly right now, I could cry.
Oh wait I have. So many times the last few days.

AND

When I actually get that orderly, busy schedule that comes with the school year, it can
become overwhelming and too much for me at times. A lot of times. And I long for less.

AND

Some very specific worries and concerns I have for a few of those I love most
in the world have felt so difficult and paralyzing to me of late. It is fueling
my depression and I’m fighting with everything I have not to go down with it.

AND

I just keep witnessing miracles. Over and over again and in ways that absolutely blow me
away with their beauty and sacredness. Especially for those that I’m so concerned about.
Angels are near and God loves my people so much, it is unimaginable. And so the peace comes.

AND

How can I have been a mother for nearly twenty-six years and
still not have a clue what I am doing? Oh my field of tulips, this is ridiculous.

AND

God continues to make me enough. While I simultaneously fall so dang short it is
unreal and embarrassing. He just keeps making it enough. Every time it matters.

I’m so grateful for a life that brings me to my knees, in tears, on a regular basis.
And has me laughing and loving and absolutely overwhelmed with my blessings in the
next moment. God has been teaching me about how so many conflicting feelings and
experiences can coexist together, even when it doesn’t make any sense. But oh my
it is beautiful and right, exhausting and ridiculous. All wrapped up together tight.

I’m so thankful for Him. And this wild, fragile, gorgeous, imperfect life I have.
I can’t believe He loves me enough to let me live it.

Two first days of school

My darling boy. Pictured here about two weeks apart. For real. Senior year for our Benjamin. 
I truly cannot believe we are doing this for the fourth time. And the fact that this is his last
first day of school makes me want to weep—while simultaneously feeling so excited for him
I could burst. He's so good and amazing. I will never get over the privilege of being his mom.

This girl

Love this girl, and these pictures, FOREVER.

And that last one. I honestly cannot.

Home

I’m so happy he’s home. He’s so grateful he went. What an incredible seventeen days.

The best people and the loveliest night

Truly one of my favorite nights in a very long time. With for sure my favorite people.
Hosted by two of the greatest humans I have ever known.

Everyone needs an Aunt Anne and Uncle Steve in their life. Because they are the kindest,
most generous, most loving and giving, most energetic and hard working, most amazing and
good people in all the land. And I always walk away from them just feeling loved to my core.

It means more than they could ever know. I’m forever thankful for them.

PS. No one will ever convince me that last photo is not the cutest picture ever taken.

Here we go again...

Braces for this stud today and as is the tradition, he most definitely looks older.
Oh man I love this boy.

A work trip to Ghana

Jacob and Matt recently returned from a two-week work trip to Ghana. Because Jacob and
his social impact team were chosen to help measure and evaluate the global initiative the
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints announced two years ago (focused on improving
the health of women, children and babies) that has become quite a big deal. And with Matt
being hired at Jacob's company a few months back (after working his head off as an intern),
we were surprised when someone staffed him on Jacob's project. That has been a huge blessing
for both Matt and Jacob and such a sweet thing for me to watch.

Their time in Ghana was amazing and incredible, difficult and exhausting. And it kicks off
a very long project with a whole lot of travel and work to make sure that the correct goals
and intentions are being met and mostly, that women and children in several developing
countries are receiving as much help and aid with their health as possible.

In addition, one of the sweetest parts of the trip happened when Jacob and Matt left a couple
 of days early, so they could visit the Ivory Coast and spend time with Jacob's parents who are
serving s the temple president and matron of the Abidjan temple. That was a huge blessing
for sure and I'm so thankful for the time they had together.

Grace's dream day

Grace's greatest dream, the one that I think she's had for the very longest, came true today.
And being there to watch it happen was pretty much the best.

In May, Grace tested to see if she would pass the requirements to be awarded her pointe shoes.
And even though we both knew she was beyond capable, we were quite sure it would take her
at least another year. She had only been taking pre-pointe for a few months and she's still only
eleven years old. So when we received the email that she had passed the test and would be
 getting her pointe shoes this summer, there was a whole lot of celebrating at our house.

And today was the day. She was invited by the two owners and teachers at her dance company,
along with their daughters and another dance friend, to go to the fitting appointment all together.
And it will be a favorite memory for all of us for a very long time to come.

Oh this Grace is the sweetest. I'm so thrilled for her. And so grateful for incredible women who
help our girl to live all of her dreams (that is not an exaggeration if you know how much
she loves dance), as well as to learn and grow, to stretch and challenge herself every day.

Oh I'm grateful for this dance company. And for our Gracie girl. It was a really good day at our house.

July service project

The July service opportunity was just the best. Not only because several of you contributed and
made it possible for this church group to continue to feed more than 150 people in the homeless
 community a filling lunch every week. But also because Jacob‘s uncle (but pretty much I claim
him as mostly my uncle because we are incredibly close and he’s one of my favorite humans
 in the whole wide world) joined us this morning at the Episcopal Church of the Good Shepherd,
to help make those lunches. And Nate and Grace and I loved it so much.

Yes, delivering the food and helping assemble the lunches was wonderful, but also being around
the other amazing volunteers and mostly, spending time with Marty made for the best day. He’s just
our favorite. And his asking to join us this time when we volunteered was the absolute sweetest.

Oh these monthly projects have become such a blessing to me and I don’t have words for how grateful
I am God asked me to do them. He’s just the greatest. What a privilege to know Him and to love Him.

An amazing two and a half weeks

He’s off. To do humanitarian work and see the beautiful country of Cambodia for the next seventeen days.
No phone (love it) and no one he knows (yet). And it’s going to be the absolute best. I’m so excited for him.

These incredible boys

The way these boys played in their last game of the Park City tournament last night was
honestly unreal. It was truly just ninety minutes of pure joy. There is nothing as a parent,
quite like being so happy for your child, you feel like you could burst. I loved every minute of it.
Oh I'm grateful for our Nate—last night meant so much to him and he played his absolute
heart out. The whole team did. I'm just so thankful I could be there to watch it happen.

When you go outside...

...to weed the garden like you’re supposed to and the sky rewards you for good behavior.

Soccer tournaments and life lessons

Who this boy is choosing to be, how hard he works at soccer (and also in life) day in and day out, his decision to
choose kindness over and over again, how he keeps holding his head high when really difficult things happen, how he
never stops cheering for others and showing up when it matters, how he is working constantly to focus only on what he
can control (which is how he reacts) and not what he cannot (pretty much everything else)—goodness, it brings a mom
to tears. And the last three days of this particular soccer tournament sure showcased every one of these things.

Second place is not too shabby for a team of boys that were unlikely to make it into the championship at all and
if they did, were likely to lose by at least four or five (how many points the other team had beat every other team
in their group). So while taking the loss by one point in the last ten seconds of the game stung, proud would be
 an understatement when it came to how we all felt about these incredible boys. And especially for how I felt
about our Nate. I'm SO honored to know him and to love him. I can't believe I could possibly be the one
 that God loves enough to be his mom and his friend. I'll never stop being thankful for it.